Farewell Hostess, no longer mostest

Courtesy of MCT

The panic! The sheer bloody horror! America is still in mourning from the heartbreaking news that Hostess Brands has closed down due to bankruptcy.

The news came out on Nov. 16 when the Hostess company put out an official notice for the public which stated the following: “Hostess brands to wind down company after BCTGM (Bakery Confectionery Tobacco Workers & Grain Millers) Union strike cripples operations.”

The BCTGM union had received several warnings from the Hostess Company that due to the strike, action was going to be taken.

On Nov. 12, three plants permanently closed down to work stoppage.

On Nov. 14, the company announced it would be forced to liquidate if workers did not return to work. By Nov. 15, it had been decided that there was an insufficient amount of employees for the company to get back on its feet.

The Hostess Company even made a last and final offer to lower prices for the incentive to attract new financing, but the BCTGM union was having none of it.

“We deeply regret the necessity of today’s decision, but we do not have the financial resources to weather an extended nationwide strike,” said CEO Gregory Rayburn in a statement.

Hostess Brands will have to lay off most of its 18,500-member workforce.

Once the news reached the public Nov. 16, there was instant panic as people rushed out to purchase and hoard as much Hostess products as possible.

It was as if the zombie apocalypse was coming.

Tallahassee, from the 2009 movie Zombieland, would be damned proud of America.

Shelves in every leading grocery store and pharmacy like Vons, Target and CVS were completely cleaned out of all the Hostess products by the end of the day. Twinkies were the first to go.

Some Hostess customers have gone as far as to list Hostess products on eBay for well above double or triple the original cost.

If you haven’t already stocked up, it may be too late.

However the key is to find them in local gas stations. You may be lucky enough to find a Ho-Ho gold mine.

Hostess sales have been dwindling since mothers have been buying healthier snacks for their children.

Turns out that fat-filled snack cakes and hearty white bread is not so good for you when eaten on a regular basis.

Who would have thought?

“There are serious questions as to the logic decision to strike,” said Robert Drain, a United States bankruptcy judge, at a hearing in White Plains, New York.

Drain was urging for the union and company to mediate in order to save the potential loss of more than 18,000 jobs because of this union strike.

Not all 18,000 employees want to be part of this stand, and are at risk of unemployment because of this righteous fight for dignity.

The BCTGM union blames the Hostess Brands company for the bankruptcy.

Many Hostess employees have blamed both the company’s management and the union for this mess.

Eulogies for Hostess Brands may have come a bit premature. The 82-year-old company and the disgruntled union agreed to talk things over, but sentiment on possible outcomes are still mixed.

If Hostess does find a solution, there’s going to be plenty of people with the unnecessary and awkward life supply stashed away in their cupboards.

One of the most likely solutions is for Hostess to fond buyers to save the day.

“A few (buyers) have surfaced already since Friday expressing interest in the brand to acquire them,” Rayburn said in a statement.

Interested contenders include ConAgra and Flower Foods.

The company with the most edge is the Mexican brand El Grupo Bimbo, the largest bread company in the world, headed by billionaire Daniel Servitje Montull, according to ABC News.

Still, there is no promised outcome. For all we know, Little Debbie could be the next hostess with the mostess.

Keep your fingers crossed, or if you fancy to be a bit more active in this whole situation, keep one hand filled with spongy sugar coma inducing Twinkies while waving a large American flag with your other hand and hope for the best.

Hostess may rise from the dead, or you may very well have to ration our beloved Ding Dongs.

About Deanna Trombley

Deanna is a 4th year undergraduate working towards her B.A. in Communications with an emphasis in Photo Communication. Her biggest aspiration is to one day be a panel moderator at Comic Con in Hall H, and not have to get in a 12 plus hour line to do so. Her hobbies include playing guitar, bass, zombie hunting, saving the galaxies in the Mass Effect trilogy and going on a life mission to read all works by F. Scott Fitzgerald.